Are You A Gentleman?

"You can see whether a person is a gentleman or not by seeing how he treats those who can be of absolutely no use to him" – as the saying goes.

We all know how we treat those whom we need or have use of.  Why does a person mistreat, ignore or be otherwise indifferent to those who can be of absolutely no use to him or her?  The root of the behaviour can be safely generalized to the absence of humility.

On a detached and spiritual level, humility as a quality allows us to consider our own defects, be modest in how we describe ourselves and be conscious of the higher powers that may be. If I were to define humility, I would say something like this - "Humility is the quality of being courteous and respectful to others."

This working definition of humility does not qualify what “others” means - and this lack of clarity seems to allow us to be selective about our humility and our disposition.

Indians are conditioned to a phrase - "Your Humble Servant". This is ridiculous. This is a hangover from the Princely and the British era where humility was confused with servility.  Humility is about maintaining our pride about who we are, what our accomplishments are, our self worth - but not about how superior we are to others.

I have always maintained that the higher a person rises in terms of knowledge, wealth, status, power, etc - the more humble a person must be.  Humility means that you are aware of your achievements that have given you knowledge, wealth, status, power, etc – but there is no arrogance.  We all admire people with these traits.  Our admiration for these people does not come from acknowleding their achievements but rather from the absence of arrogance.

There are mountains of materials on leadership.  Management text books go about describing leadership in all its managerial aspect.  However, to lead you must have someone to follow - and nobody follows arrogance.

Copyright - Nitesh Kotecha